Friday, July 16, 2010

Lazy Days, Finally

After a horrendous semester in school and entirely too much time spent away from Eliahna, I am finally home with her. I am home with her all day everyday. We get to play all day and jsut be lazy. We take naps, go for walks and practice walking. Its so amazing just to be able to be with her all the time. I missed her so much. The first day I went back to school after she arrived, she had just turned two months old and I still remember the sound of her crying as I walked down the hall way and farther away from her. The only consolation, if there was one, was seeing the way her little eyes little up and her arms shoot up for me to pick her up when i got home. I feel so lucky that I never had to put her in day care. There is nothing wrong with those who do use day care, but I am way to paranoid and have heard too many horror stories from moms who did send their kids to day care. My grandmother, Eliahna's great-grandma was able to watch her with I was in class. I'm thankful for that everyday. I'm thankful for the fact that i don't have to worry what's happening to her, or if they're cuddling her the way she likes, or if shes being changed in the timely manner. I know, without a doubt in my mind, that Eliahna is getting the best care possible when I'm not able to be with her.

When Eliahna was born, I momentarily contemplated not going back to school. I didn't want to be away from her, I was scared that something would happen to her while i was gone, and I was scared that i would miss something like the first word, first time she walked, or the first time she rolled over. Then after thinking all of that I realized that I am going to school FOR her. I'm going to school to set a good example for her, to show her that anything is possible and that there is nothing better than following your dreams. I know one day that she will be proud of me and in just knowing that, I have become proud of myself and luckily for me I have managed to not miss a single first. I saw her roll over at two months. I saw her say her first word on December 23, 2009,which happened to be Mama. I saw her first steps on June 20, 2010, Father's Day, which made Glen extremely happy. I love that I was able to see everything, but as time goes on I'm starting to realize that even if i would have missed those things, it would have been okay because Eliahna knows that I love he unconditionally and I know she feels the same. At the end of the day thats all that matters.

I'm glad that I have Glen to talk about everything with and to always be supportive fo my decisions. He has told me since day one that everything will work out and that he will always take care of Eliahna and I. Knowing that I have that support and love coming from my partner, it gives me all the confidence in the world. Everyday that goes by, we realized that having Eliahna is the best thing that could have ever happened to us. We found out we were pregnant on October 18, 2009 and it changed our lives. Instead of thinking of ourselves, we began to see the world differently and realize that we now shared our life with our baby:

Eliahna Mehkai
June 22, 2009
11:23 AM
6 Pounds 12 Ounces